You’ve got mail

Snail mail has become a thing of the past with the advent of social media and is increasingly becoming the medium of choice for event invitations. How easy is it to post an event on Facebook, invite your friends and let it collate the Yes, No, Maybes for you? It’s also great for guests wanting to avoid awkward run ins with exes and frenemies, waiting for their decline before accepting their invitation.

Where this new social phenomenon sits with traditional and significant events such as weddings is still a grey area but more and more people are turning to the e-vite in lieu of pen and paper. Wedding invitations are big business with many upwards of $10 each and when you’re on a budget or with a large guest list, this can become very costly. Not to mention the dizzying array of choice. What size – DL, A5, A6? What type of paper – gloss, matte, silk? Embellishments? Pocketfold? Single sided? Double sided? And nowadays it’s not just the invitation, there’s also the RSVP card, registry card, wishing well card, venue map, accommodation cards, the list goes on.

It all seems a bit too much so resorting to a group email seems like the perfect answer…or is it? Weddings are the few occasions that involve multi generations of the family and not all Nannas have an email address or a computer for that matter! You can also run the risk of disappearing into someone’s junk mail or worse still, your own inbox deciding to have a melt down. When making a decision on how to invite friends and family to your wedding day, remember there’s always something implicitly special about opening your letter box to find a beautiful envelope with your name in fancy script on the front. The joy from realizing the effort a couple has gone to in creating invitations (even if they were on the verge of breaking up just from choosing the design) and sending you one are tangible and enduring unlike the ‘delete’ button on your keyboard.

What’s mine is yours baby…sort of

Once reserved for the pages of gossip magazines and the lives of millionaire businessmen, drawing up a prenup is now common place on many a civilian wedding to do list between booking the DJ and getting a spray tan. Legally known as a prenuptial agreement, it is exactly that; an agreement on how to divide your belongings when you break up…before you get married. Romantic? Maybe not but some would deem it necessary.

Statistics show couples are getting married later in life than generations before them, mostly after building their careers and property portfolios and who can blame them for wanting to protect their bricks and mortar?  With divorce rates are at an all time high, should people be judged for wanting a little insurance before making the biggest commitment of their lives?

The debate lies in the need to protect your assets from the one person you are about to legally bind yourself to for the rest of your natural life and declare in front of your family and friends that you have found ‘the one’. Why get married if you aren’t willing to share your wealth and whatever happened to what’s mine is yours? The 21st century is what happened. The pressure society places on material wealth have been exponentially driven by celebrity culture, the late Steve Jobs and social media. It’s hard to ignore all the Facebook status updates of ‘Just picked up the keys to my new penthouse!’ and ‘OMG, who knew owning a Porsche would be so fun?’. The need to compete for material supremacy amongst your peers is rife and the fear of losing this status drives many to protect themselves with a lawyer and a contract.

Only you can decide if a prenup is right for you and your partner but before you put pen to paper, maybe you should take a moment to think more about the reasons you fell in love and less time dividing up the DVD collection.

The art of ‘Wish-ing Well’

As with all social trends, marriage and weddings have changed and evolved over the years. Gone are the days when couples moved straight from their childhood home into domestic bliss with their newly betrothed. Now, many couples are living in long term de-facto relationships by the time they walk down the aisle. Traditionally the father of the bride would fork out for the wedding but with more and more parents spending their children’s inheritance on sports cars and lavish holidays there’s not much to spare for a reception for their child’s 100 nearest and dearest.

So what does this mean for the average gift giving guest? Finding a wedding present just got that little bit harder!

With all the household necessities already taken care of, many invitees will find a cute little poem in their invitation very politely asking for monetary gifts to put towards a mortgage or honeymoon. Although ‘Wishing Wells’ are fairly common practice, some still find it awkward when trying to decide just how much is enough to give. Unfortunately there is no right answer but never feel obliged to spend beyond your means. True friends will always much rather your company than a big, fat envelope of cash. Some key factors to consider in your decision making are the type of wedding it is (cocktail, black tie, destination), your relationship with the couple and your own personal circumstances.

If you are a purist and prefer the intimacy of giving a gift, approach the couple and let them know of your intention. Of course you can just show up with one on the day but it is always nice to explain your reasons behind choosing a particular gift and the significance it has to you and them. Whatever you decide to do, don’t forget the reason why you were invited; to celebrate the love and commitment two people are making for the rest of their lives. Only a select few were chosen to be there so that in itself is a huge compliment.

There’s no hiding from cupid!

While opinion is divided on the merits of a day dedicated to making your loved one feel loved there is no hiding from Valentine’s Day;  it’s everywhere. Open any newspapers or watch any TV program and you will be confronted with ads on how to spoil your ‘someone special’. Everything from a diamond ring, romantic dinner, red roses and personalized experiences are touted as the ‘perfect gift’.

No wonder panicked men roam shopping centres on February 13, lost and confused about what gift to buy and what it says about them.

With so much anticipation built over one day, and so many options to choose from many are left to ponder if it is even worth buying into the hype but no-one wants to the be the ONLY one in the office who didn’t get a present. This is more the case for girls who eye every delivery man with flowers with a glint of hope in their eye as he walks through the door. There is always a guaranteed squeal from the lucky recipient and a passive aggressive ‘another bunch of flowers JUST got delivered’ text to every other girls’ boyfriend/husband.

The age old ‘we don’t need to celebrate Valentine’s Day’ used to work in the days before Facebook and Twitter but now everybody’s life is documented and uploaded instantaneously; ready to be scrutinized by our so called friends. The need to outdo one another is innate but please do resist the urge! Everyday should be about making your partner feel spoilt and special and not just when peer pressure tells you to. Sometimes it is all about the smallest of gestures or an inside joke with your other half. If you never do the dishes or take out the bin then February 14 is your turn or even just make a coffee for your partner before they need to ask. The moral of the story is Valentine’s Day doesn’t need to be a day of grand gestures (despite what everyone says) sometimes it’s just about letting the person you love know; you always have their back. It’s as simple as that.

The Power of a Princess

It was the stuff of fairytales; a common girl falling in love with a handsome prince and living happily ever after following the most anticipated wedding of our generation. With an estimated two billion people tuning in, there was only one thing on everyone’s mind; what was she going to wear? The hype surrounding Kate Middleton’s dress started as soon as the engagement was announced with bets placed on illustrious designers such as Very Wang, Monique Lhuillier and upmarket British label Temperley London. The gong eventually went to the late Alexander McQueen’s fashion house with their interpretation of Grace Kelly’s gown, fittingly worn when she too married a prince.

While most of the world watched on with their eyes welling up with tears of joy (and envy), many just saw dollar signs. Weddings are a 2 billion dollar industry in Australia alone and within hours of Kate & William’s wedding, a copycat gown was available to buy for hundreds instead of thousands of dollars. In the 9 months since, we have seen a spike in popularity of almost all the elements of her day from wedding dresses with lace sleeves, baby’s breath bouquets and sapphire engagement rings. All of which were typically considered ‘old fashioned’ prior to 2011. Even ivory bridesmaids gowns have become the new rigeur du jour with Kate’s sister Pippa catapulted into superstardom during her turn in a form fitting gown.

Flick through any post royal wedding bridal magazine and you will find many images that are ‘familiar’ and who can blame them. Everyone wants to feel like a princess on their special day so why not borrow from a real one. However, as with any new trend, it is usually replaced when the next best thing comes along and in Kate and Will’s case it is Edward and Bella. Keep an eye out for porcelain skin and sheer lace back gowns in 10 years time when our generation of tweens are ready to tie the knot.